Ah, A-Rod. Here’s a guy who has a chance to become the greatest player in the history of his sport, breaking tons of records while playing for the most prominent team in his sport. He plays on a team that has a chance at title every year. He’s still in the prime of his career. He is good-looking, talented and has access to the largest media market in America.

And he’s a total turd, in the eyes of the public.

His public foibles (yes, foibles!) have been well-documented. But let’s run through them one more time:

• This year, despite the begging of Major League Baseball, A-Rod opted to sit out the Home Run Derby, which was being held at his home park. He mumbled some lame excuse about how it messes up his swing. What better chance for him to show off his talent in a fun, relaxed atmosphere?  If he had gone out and ripped a bunch of long homers, it would have helped his image.  If he had stunk, well, his image can’t get any worse.
• He’s getting divorced from his wife, after being spotted with Madonna. A-Rod, you’re 33 years old. Madonna is 50.  Also, you were married.
• Last year, a story came out about how A-Rod passed out in the delivery room during the birth of his child. This did not help the perception that he’s a sissy.
• Last year, he was spotted entering a strip club with a woman who looked like a cross between Jay Buhner and Edgar Winter.
• When once asked why he thinks people don’t like him, he said it might be because he’s good-looking and Latin, and people are jealous.  Way to appeal to the masses.
• Gave an in-depth interview where he discussed his sensitive relationship with Derek Jeter. He mentioned that the two used to always “sleep over,” but they don’t anymore.
• Attempted to show his sensitive side during an ESPN interview, talking about how he goes to therapy. I have no problem with therapy, but A-Rod managed to shoot himself in the foot by uttering that “therapy can be very therapeutic.”

I’m not sure I can recall an athlete who has had as many embarrassing blowups — that aren’t crimes, at least — in recent years. And none of A-Rods mistakes have been handled well. So I want to know, who is A-Rod’s publicist?

It’s interesting to compare the branding of Michael Jordan and A-Rod. Jordan was the greatest basketball player of all-time; Rodriguez will wind up being one of the best players ever. They both played in huge media markets. But the perception of the two couldn’t be more different.

Jordan is viewed as a global icon. At his peak, he was once said to be the single most recognizable face on the planet. He had incredible endorsement deals. His image was infallible. He also cheated on his wife, had a gambling addiction and got in fist-fights with teammates because he was so competitive.

We can see the same type of careful branding with LeBron James. His image is so carefully controlled by his handlers, he has been able to overcome some minor blips to have a great public image.

As for A-Rod? Well, every little piece of information is allowed to spiral out of control. He’s now viewed as a choking, mentally-weak loser who won’t ever get it done on the field. And worst yet, nothing is ever done to combat these perceptions. When A-Rod says he doesn’t sleep over with Derek Jeter anymore, or he refuses to participate in a fan-centric event like the Home Run Derby, he goes into a shell and lets everything fester. And his image continues to get worse.

Maybe he doesn’t care about public perception, which, I suppose, would be admirable in some fashion. He has more money than he needs, and he probably understands how good he is on the field.  Why should he care what people think?  But he’s not like Barry Bonds.  You still get the sense that A-Rod does care what people think.

Honestly, I’m not even sure how his image could be repaired at this point. LeBron currently takes part in all sorts of wacky advertisements, and is able to pull it off. But can you imagine A-Rod trying to play the lead in a commercial like this? It’d be the unintentional comedy event of the summer.

I guess what I’m trying to say is that A-Rod’s public image sucks, it’s a little unfortunate given his talent, and I think it’d be difficult to alter that image, no matter how carefully he was branded and marketed.

Of course, if A-Rod wants to offer me the measly sum of one-half-of-one-percent of his annual salary, I’d be more than happy to take a stab at it. I can be reached via the link near the top right of the page. Talk to you soon!

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I think the Olympics are kind of weird.

Truthfully, I’ve never been able to get a handle on them as a sports fan. My patriotism is probably best described as “lukewarm,” so the national pride angle doesn’t really do it for me. The broadcast schedules are weird, so it’s hard to watch much of the competition. The number of events is staggering, and they keep adding new ones all the time — BMX biking is now an Olympic event — so it’s hard to know which ones to follow. According to Wikipedia, there are 302 events this year.

That number surprised me, because I was under the impression that there were just eight events this summer, and Michael Phelps was competing in all of them.

I find NBC’s promotion of Phelps fascinating. The network spent $894 million for the Olympic broadcast rights ($52.6 million a day), and will spend another $125 million producing the games, so they definitely want to make sure people are watching.

To ensure this, NBC has run 476,000 promos (source: hyperbole) featuring Phelps and his chase for eight gold medals. Every time you tune into NBC, Phelps is there. During the morning shows, there he is; while watching the Wimbledon finals, there he is; while watching Leno, there he is; digitally inserted into re-runs of The Office, there he is.

But do we, as American people, actually care about Michael Phelps? It seems that media outlets have taken the Phelps story and run with it, much to NBC’s delight. I saw an article today where the writer was pondering if Phelps was the new Tiger Woods. He’s not, of course, since he’s only relevant once every four years and will be past his prime by the time the 2012 Olympics roll around, meaning the nation will watch Phelps compete for about 10 days during his entire swimming career.

Regardless, the swimmer is everywhere these days, and his omnipresence will only intensify in the month leading up to Beijing. They’ve moved the swimming coverage to prime-time, and they’re hoping that his chase for a record eight gold medals will be enough to get viewers to tune in for more of the Olympics. That NBC has pumped up their promotion of him to such a dizzying amount reminds me of when ESPN, which had never cared about NASCAR, acquired the broadcast rights to the sport and suddenly began promoting it at every turn. And some people actually started to care about NASCAR. Just because it was there.

Like ESPN did with racing, NBC is basically telling you what’s important. They’re creating the news by forcing you to be interested in Michael Phelps. You don’t have a choice at this point. For the next six weeks, Phelps will be the biggest sports story in the world. If you like sports, you’ll have to pay attention or you’ll be left behind.

The network has referred to this Olympics as their “billion dollar experiment” and will be providing coverage of the events online and via mobile phone, too. There will be online streaming, Web exclusives, blogging, downloads and games to play. It’s a bonanza! Or something like that.

Credit NBC for expanding their offerings and really using this as an opportunity to learn more about how people like to receive information. I’m guessing that they’ll find out a lot of stuff, not the least of which is that the viewing public will soak up anything if they’re told it’s important over and over again.

Keep that in mind when the 2010 Vancouver features nothing but promos for a 28-year-old skicross athlete who will be chasing two gold medals and a bronze, in spite of the untimely death of her pet macropod.

Don’t tell me you won’t watch.

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